On Sunday morning, I locked myself out of the house. It was supposed to be a simple routine—letting the cat outside—but within seconds, I was stuck. I had unknowingly turned the lock behind me, shutting myself out with no way back in.
My first instinct was to check for a hidden key or an unlocked door—no luck. With no easy way in, I started trying to force my way through.
For two hours, I struggled. I tried everything. My bare feet were cold, I was exhausted, and still, the door wouldn’t budge.
With no phone, no help, and no options left, I finally surrendered. I stopped fighting and decided to look for another way in. Walking around the house, I checked a different door. And there it was—unlocked, waiting for me to step through.
The moment I walked back inside, it hit me: how often do we do this in life? How often do we pour energy into something that refuses to open, believing that if we just try harder, we’ll break through? And yet, sometimes, the right path—the one that actually leads us where we need to go—is already open. We just haven’t looked for it.
Why Do We Force Things Instead of Flowing with Life?
Why do we struggle and force situations instead of recognizing and following the path of least resistance? Here are some reasons I can think of:
1. Conditioning & Beliefs
Many of us are raised to believe that success requires hard work, struggle, and persistence. We’re told, “Never give up,”and that pushing through obstacles is the only way to achieve something meaningful. While resilience is valuable, this mindset can sometimes blind us to the fact that not all doors are meant to be forced open.
2. Ego & Attachment
The ego wants control. It resists the idea of surrender because surrender can feel like failure or weakness. When we've invested time, energy, or emotion into something, we develop an attachment to it working out—even when the signs are telling us to let go.
3. Fear of the Unknown
Choosing a new path means stepping into uncertainty. Even if we’re struggling, at least we know the struggle. The unknown is unpredictable, and that can feel scarier than staying stuck in a difficult situation.
4. Confirmation Bias
When we want something badly, we filter reality to support our desires. We ignore signs that a path isn’t working and focus only on evidence that justifies forcing a situation. This makes it harder to recognize when it’s time to shift directions.
5. Survival Instincts & Scarcity Mindset
The brain is wired for survival, not necessarily happiness. Historically, humans needed to persist to find food, shelter, and safety. This survival drive can make us hold onto situations (relationships, jobs, businesses) longer than we should because we fear losing what we already have.
6. The Need for Meaning
Struggle can feel meaningful. We often believe that suffering equates to growth and that ease is undeserved or unearned. But sometimes, growth comes not from struggle, but from realization—from recognizing when it’s time to shift instead of push.
How Do We Shift from Force into Flow?
Pause and Observe – Instead of reacting with force, step back and ask: Is this really the right path? Or am I just afraid to change?
Release Attachment – Let go of the idea that things must happen a certain way. Trust that if one door is locked, another will open.
Trust Flow Over Force – Notice when things feel forced and when they feel aligned. The best paths often unfold with ease.
Reframe Surrender as Strength – Surrender is not giving up; it’s choosing wisely where to invest your energy.
Cultivate Inner Awareness – Practices like mindfulness, meditation, journaling, and self-reflection help us tune into what feels aligned versus what is simply familiar.
The key isn’t to avoid effort—it’s to know when effort is productive and when it’s just resistance in disguise. True power lies in learning when to push and when to pivot.
While recognizing the right path is crucial, it's equally important to know when pushing through and fighting for something is the right course of action. Not every obstacle means we should walk away—some struggles are necessary for growth, mastery, and achieving what truly matters.
When to Push Through vs. When to Let Go
Push Through When:
The Resistance is Temporary and Part of Growth – Some struggles are a natural part of learning, skill-building, or self-development. If the challenge helps you grow, it’s worth pushing through.
You Feel a Deep Internal Knowing – If something truly matters to you at a soul level, then obstacles may just be tests of resilience, not signs to quit.
The Resistance is External, Not Internal – If your doubts are based on fear, lack of confidence, or outside opinions rather than your own inner truth, it’s often a sign to keep going.
The Path is Hard, But Not Depleting – If the struggle is tough but still fuels your passion and purpose, it’s a sign of meaningful effort, not wasted energy.
You Are Fighting for a Bigger Purpose – Some battles are worth it—whether it’s pursuing a dream, standing up with integrity, or creating positive change. If the cost of quitting is regret, it may be worth the fight.
Let Go When:
You’re Constantly Hitting Walls with No Progress – If no matter how much effort you put in, nothing shifts, it may be a sign that this isn’t your door.
It’s Draining Your Energy Instead of Expanding It – Struggles that leave you depleted, uninspired, and disconnected may not be struggles worth enduring.
You’re Holding On Out of Ego, Not Alignment – If the only reason you’re pushing is pride, attachment, or fear of being “wrong,” it might be time to step back.
The Signs Are Repeatedly Pointing You Elsewhere – If life keeps redirecting you and opportunities keep appearing in a different direction, it’s worth paying attention.
You Feel a Deep Inner Resistance, Not Just Fear – Fear and discomfort are normal in growth. But if your entire being feels out of sync with what you’re doing, it may be time to shift.
The Balance Between Effort and Alignment
Not all struggles mean “this isn’t for you.” Some challenges are stepping stones to transformation. The key is discerning between productive effort and wasted resistance. The question to ask yourself is:
"Am I struggling because this is a meaningful challenge I must overcome, or because I’m forcing something that isn’t meant for me?"
Mastering this balance means knowing when to fight and when to flow—when to push through, and when to step back and allow a new door to open. True wisdom lies in recognizing the difference within you.
The Wisdom of Discernment
Not every struggle means we should quit, but not every challenge is meant to be conquered either. There’s a difference between persistence and force, between fighting for what’s right and clinging to what’s wrong.
Sometimes, the struggle isn’t proof that we need to try harder—it’s an invitation to look around and find the path that is already open.
Today's reminder: Pay attention. Stop forcing what doesn’t flow and what is not unfolding naturally. If one path feels blocked no matter how hard you push, take a step back and reassess, look for another way. The right path—the one meant for you—might already be open, waiting for you to notice it.
Guillermina Neal | HealCoach
Reiki Master/Teacher & Holistic Healing Coach
#FlowNotForce #TrustYourPath #AlignedOpportunities #HealingTruths #PathOfLeastResistance #Alignment #EnergyHealing #HealCoach
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